Are you due on?

One of them days, one of them days, oh i’m having one of them days..

It’s Wednesday 18th, September 2019 and the time is now 11:30am, as I sit in my bed, in England and type this..

My cycle is due, my head aches, my breasts have been sore for days, I feel tired and lethargic and although I did get up and out of bed at 07:30am this morning to do my daily facebook live video, I did get back into bed…

I do not remember the last time I just chilled in bed. For me, your bed is a place to sleep and once you’re awake you get up, make the bed and go on about your day. However, I rebelled against that today and allowed myself some time to rest up.

You know the kind of day where you just don’t feel like talking to anyone? The kind of day where you’d like to stay in bed all day and just stay in your pjs, snuggled under the duvet..

The kind of day, where something can happen and you just start crying?

The kind of day where you wonder, is it just me? Or do others feel the same way. The kind of day, where you wonder, is this honestly, going to affect me for the rest of my menstrual cycle life?

The clock struck 08:30am and I pressed ‘start live video’ the air was fresh, I could see the moon, I was chatting away into the camera, everything was fine.

Then I looked to my left and I saw my Mum walking towards the washing line, just meters away from me, with the washing basket in her arms. We locked eyes and I looked back at the camera, took a deep breath in and said quietly ‘and breathe’ I could feel the tension rising in my body, which became too much, so I decided to suddenly stop talking and start the guided meditation, so that I could close my eyes. Tears were rolling down my cheeks, but I knew it would be ok, because everyone else that is tuning into the video, will have their eyes closed, so they will be none the wiser.

My emotional state when I am due on, is so wobbly and so unexpected, but i’m just having to come to terms with, that’s me and that’s ok.

I have had jobs before and relationships with people before, where they comment on my crying. This Marilyn Monroe quote comes to mind ”if you can’t handle me at my worst, you don’t deserve me at my best”

I do not take any prescription medications of any kind for any reasons.

I comfort myself with tea, podcasts and a hot water bottle. When the painful stomach cramps arrive, I massage coconut oil and clary sage essential oil into my belly and if it really is unbearable, as a last resort, I will take a couple of ibuprofen.

I am 28 and I live with my Mum and her partner and my sister. I feel claustrophobic in the place we live, I feel uncomfortable, I feel like I am trapped, I feel like I cannot be myself, I feel misunderstood, I sometimes feel depressed, I have had suicidal thoughts before, I do not get on with my mum, or my sister or step dad really, but due to financial restrictions, I know this is currently the only place I can be, so again, I have to just accept it and find ways of relieving the feelings I get when i’m due on.

I do remember some conversations when I was much younger, around menstrual cycles, of physical burdens like sore breasts, stomach cramps etc, but I never realised there could be a mental aspect of menstrual cycles too.

It actually, wasn’t even until my now, ex boyfriend, once made a comment, it was like a lightbulb moment, “this is every month”, he didn’t even realise what he was saying. That’s when I suddenly remembered i’d found something before called PMDD, whilst I was up late one night researching about how I was feeling. I’d bi passed it and let it go, until April this year, when my boyfriend and I split, because I was emotional irrational and I decided to go to the doctors. I spoke about this PMDD after lots more research and finding some information on the ‘mind’ charity website, which is how I then found out about facebook groups for PMDD and I was later connected to my step brothers girlfriend in the group, who has privately been diagnosed with PMDD. The NHS still do not say it is this.

I have not been given a diagnosis, and I do not intend on using my energy to get one, I know what happens to me, I know the feelings and thoughts I get and my main intention is to find ways that help me move forward, not stay stuck on the issue as that doesn’t help us move forward.

Top tips to help manage your symptoms;

  • Remind yourself, it is a natural process for female born bodies to have a monthly menstrual cycle, remind yourself, this is natures work, let it come and let it go.
  • Comparing is despairing – Comparison is the thief of all joy, do not compare yourself to others, every single human is different, we know that because of our fingerprint. So allow yourself to be beautifully unique.
  • Be kind to yourself – kind self talk, reassuring words, positive affirmations
  • Embrace your journey – when we get frustrated with ourself, we end up resenting ourself, just allow yourself to feel into the emotions and thoughts you have. If they are critical, call 999
  • Choose to make healthier choices – every time, before eating something, ask yourself, is this going to make me feel better or worse? Am I consuming enough water based foods/drinks to help keep my bodies cells and organs including skin nourished and hydrated? Am I physically moving my body, whether it’s walking, yoga, swimming, netball, going to the gym, get the body moving physically. Are you connecting to nature? Noticing the birds, the trees, the stars and the moon? Be aware of your surroundings. Are you connecting in person with others? Whether it’s meeting a work colleague or a friend, family member, or even paying someone a compliment when you’re out and about, stay connected in person (not just hiding behind a laptop/ phone/ tablet) Are you learning? Not just about PMS or PMDD, or you taking the time to learn something new? A passion, a hobby of yours, something you’d like to do more of, whether it’s reading a book or going to a library or asking someone who is a professional in that field or whether it’s searching the net.
    These are the 5 ways to well-being as described in the last bullet point above;
  • Stay Active – Take Notice – Connect – Give – Learn

I hope this read can at least help 1 person,

Love

Louise

Founder

‘stress less, relax to the max’ ltd

http://www.stresslessandrelax.com

Have you ever had suicidal thoughts?

I have.

Did you know, one doesn’t have to be diagnosed with a mental health illness to have suicidal thoughts.

Anyone can have suicidal thoughts.

There are numerous factors as to why someone could have suicidal thoughts…

  • Loss of a loved one,
  • A broken heart,
  • Financial hardship,
  • Trauma,
  • Loneliness and the list goes on…

Anyone can have suicidal thoughts.

One doesn’t have to be diagnosed with a mental health illness to have suicidal thoughts.

If you have experienced any of the above or other situations and you have suicidal thoughts, reach out for help, a friend, a family member, a colleague or in a case of an emergency call 999

If you know of anyone who has experienced, or is experiencing any of the above, reach out to them and say “i’m thinking of you, how are you?”

Today is world suicide prevention day.

If someone you know has recently experience a traumatic event in their life, reach out to them, ask the question, “are you having suicidal thoughts” asking this question is a very safe practice and may save someones life. If you are concerned about someones livelihood, in an emergency call 999.

Sometimes people feel so alone, being asked the question, can be a relief and a weight off of someones shoulders.

I trained as a mental health first aider and one of the topics covered was suicide. After qualifying, I now provide an additional service to my clients who attend my meditation classes, the service is a catch up, out of class, just to let them talk and be heard, non judgementally.

Besides my business, I also offer my time when possible. . .

But, please, please, please, remember to look after yourself too.

I recently met with a girl, a few years younger than me, this girl had actually attempted suicide numerous times just days before I met with her.

I experienced severe anxiety when I left this girl and I booked myself in for a session or reiki to help my anxiety (which it did). I have met with this girl on additional occasions and it turns out we have a lot in common. I texted Emma today and she is doing well 🙂

World suicide prevention day,

Remember,

Anyone can have suicidal thoughts.

One doesn’t have to be diagnosed with a mental health illness to have suicidal thoughts.

Click here for one of my free guided meditation videos, I hope it helps 🙂

Love Louise x

Founder

‘stress less, relax to the max’

Do you ever feel uncertain about which direction your life is going?

Before I go on, my name is Louise, i’m 28 years young, I live in Hertfordshire in England with my Mum, Step Dad & sister, I run my own business, I am not in a relationship and I have no children and i’ve never been married.

When I was travelling back in 2015, I met a guy when I was on an island called Nusa Lembongan, in Indonesia, we were at a full moon party, he told me that he’d been to Antarctica and he went on a sailing type of boat as opposed to a luxury cruise ship, I was so inspired by him and this blog is dedicated to you……

…….My Mum made a comment to me just a matter of days ago, she said, “you should get on that dating site, otherwise you’re never going to meet anyone” I felt really confused hearing these words come out of her mouth, because I thought to myself, why does she think I need to find a man? I’m running my business and i’m doing ok, why do I need to meet someone? Will my life not be complete until I have a man or a family of my own?

I don’t have a television in my bedroom out of choice, so when i’m in the living room, I kind of just have to watch what others are watching, unless I potter around doing something else. My sister was watching a programme the other day called “Kathy Burke’s all woman”, which sounded interesting, so I stuck by to listen in. One of the topics on the show Kathy was discussing, was the pressures that females have in life, in particular motherhood. As a woman, I feel immense pressure sometimes, do I wan’t kids? Can I even have kids? A women is constantly losing eggs, so we know time is running out as such.. I read 1 article that said women lose 90% of their eggs by the age of 30.. and some women have even paid to freeze their eggs so that they can have a back up plan….

It can be scary if you think about it too much because these questions come about like “am I ever going to be a Mum?” but then, “hang on, do I actually want to be a Mum?” “Why am I not a Mum already” You feel like you’re playing a tennis match in your mind. You find yourself scrolling on instagram or facebook looking at other peoples lives and you question your own and you find yourself going into a downward spiral….

In my life i’ve had 6 relationships with males, where i’ve committed my all into the relationship, they’ve all met my family, discussions of future have come about, some of them I lived with, some of them I travelled with, some of them i’ve revisited, but clearly, none of the relationships worked out..

I had a bit of an epiphany shall we say a few months ago after my most recent relationship broke down, because I thought to myself, wow, some people meet one day over a coat and 66 years later, they’re still married… (true story) that’s my grandparents, mother and father of my father….

so I thought to myself, how have I been in 6 relationships and none of them work? I keep hearing these words of “there’s plenty more fish in the sea” or “he wasn’t good enough for you” or “you deserve better” bla bla bla…. but that epiphany, where I thought, blimey, maybe it’s me?…. I wondered do I not deserve love? Am I not capable of love? Why am I such a bad girlfriend? Am I not good enough? Why me? Everyone else around me is in relationships, married or has kids, why am I still single at 28 living with my parents?!

1 day as I lay in bed, I couldn’t sleep, constant thoughts about everything and anything as you do and I found myself googling some relationship advise or something and I came across a relationship coach who is also a psychotherapist. What I learned and figured, is that it was time for me to focus on me. This is not the time for me to invest in a relationship and a family, I had my own underlying issues to deal with, because all that would happen, is I would keep going around in circles until I finally addressed my life.

Everyone in this world is unique, we all have our own stories with up’s and downs and round and rounds, we may drink wine to numb our pain or overwork ourselves because we can’t bare the thought of being alone, or we might splash out on a new car because it fills that empty void. Thing’s don’t work out and we just say ”oh it wasn’t meant to be” and we become confused about which direction to take. What will bring us lasting joy and what will make me feel successful?

When all of these questions are going on and your head is working in overdrive at 100mph, the first thing I would recommend, is take a deep breath….

Meditation helps to ground us, because it brings our awareness back to the present moment. Yesterday i.e. the past, is thoughts, tomorrow i.e. the future, is thoughts. We get so lost in our thoughts that we miss the moment. We can be sat on a balcony with a nice cup of tea and a blanket watching the night sky, but worrying about how our future will look, but why does it even matter when the present moment is so perfect?

It’s because society, i.e. marketing/ advertising shows us how we should apparently live our life, from school to college, getting a job to getting married, to making a family and then you live happily after, but for some, this doesn’t happen and if it doesn’t it seems we have failed at life, like we did something wrong or that we must not be happy because we are not living our lives by the confines of the majority of the society.

If anything I have said resonates with you, I think the most important thing you can also do, is take time to focus on you in the present moment, reconnect with your breath, ground yourself and remind yourself how great life is right now through gratitude and with practice, soon you will stop worrying about the future, because the future doesn’t exist, the only moment is now. Remember life is a journey, there is no destination, enjoy the ride, embrace the lows with the highs, we cannot have sunshine without rain. “Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass, it’s about learning to dance in the rain”

You can watch my live guided meditation tutorial to help you more; right here right now, this is the only true moment to experience..

If you have recently come out of a relationship and if you’re interested in the coach I spoke about here is ‘Coach Craig kenneth’s youtube page’

Positive affirmation “I am enough”

Big hug and lots of love,

Louise

‘YogaMatters’ A little reflection….

17 days and counting…

I’d like to tell you a story, and the reason I want to tell you this story, is to remind you to look out for the stars and to trust 100% in the process…


Rewind to 2012, I was 21, I was living in my first rented property, a cute little 3 bed in Hatfield, I was working at the time in Borehamwood, in this coffee shop that was inside an office building, my Mum got me the job, she used to work as the same, but in Welwyn and every time she tried to describe where she worked I had no idea what she was on about. Until I entered this kind of corporate world…

I was also working as a cleaner in my step Dads children’s nurseries, because at that time, I wanted to go travelling, i’d bought a hilarious little motorhome (in the pic below) and the idea was for my boyfriend at the time and me to travel around Europe.. We did indeed drive to the Isle of White to visit my friends, but then we soon broke up and I sold it off..

But there was some light, because this very smiley Indian man kept coming into the coffee shop, he didn’t talk much, just smiled a lot.. turns out he was the owner of the whole building..
His son approached me and asked me if i’d consider a job on reception and I said i’d love to, before this coffee shop job I was working as a receptionist in a hotel! Literally within days I was transferred to this, still being constructed building in Welwyn, which is known as Orion House, this is where my Mum was working in that coffee shop remember?

There were numerous companies who rented the offices in this building and I had great relations with all of the people there (bar 1!) 1 of the guys who worked in 1 of the offices, was an Indian guy called Vijay, he and his colleague visited the coffee shop daily, his colleague actually invited me to his wedding back home in India, but I didn’t feel brave enough to go alone and no-one was up for coming with me…

Fast forward to 2018…..

I was teaching 2 meditation classes per week at the time and I couldn’t relocate 1 of my sessions to another hall, I felt despair and I didn’t know what to do.. I kept putting it off as you do, hoping it would go away…. and then I was out walking a couple of dogs one day and I asked to myself, as I walked in solitude, what are you going to do Louise? Instaneously, the word India came to my mind..

I found the closest bench and I sat down, I pulled out my phone, and I got onto facebook and I messaged to Vijay from all those years ago and I said, i’m spending Summer in India!


I flew in July 2018 to Delhi where I was welcomed by Vijays colleague, on his moped and he had arranged for us to visit the Taj Mahal with my friend who I met on my stop off in Bahrain…

My reason for choosing India over and above anywhere in the world, was Yoga and I didn’t want to learn it anywhere but where it all started..

Fast forward to Summer 2019…
In June I went to France, on a Yoga retreat, I couldn’t help but notice when I sat down on my Yoga mat, the words I saw ‘Yoga Matters’ this was actually the brand of equipment and I just thought to myself, if I ever start to teach Yoga one day, this is the company I would love to buy from, as it is a constant reminder, that ‘Yoga Matters’..


I cannot believe I am saying this, but 2 months on from that French retreat and as the reality gets a little closer, I have just in fact placed an order for all of the Yoga equipment with ‘Yoga Matters’ in preparation for me to teach Yoga classes…….

So what is the moral of the story? When you have these moments of ”what is life?” ”who am I?” ”what’s my purpose?” “Why me?” You’ve just got to trust the process and go with the flow…. Everything will work out as it is supposed to. These past 7 years have been a whirlwind and I couldn’t have imagined all that i’d go through if I tried, but what I have done is learned and experienced so much, which I can now use as knowledge to not only help me, but help others too.. One of my favourite life qoutes; “it’s not what you know, it’s who you know”…


So who are these Yoga classes for?

These Yoga classes are for those females who are just starting out with their Yoga journey and the classes are for ‘4’ females only.
Classes commence on Thursday 12th September 2019, 20:15-21:15 in Welwyn Garden City, Hertfordshire

You can PAYG = £30.00 or invest in a 6 session Flexi pass = £120.00

For more information, please email me on louise@stresslessandrelax.com

Keep looking up to the stars,

Louise x

Founder

All that a human can do, why Meditate?

Wednesday 14th August 2019, I am writing this on my mac from the dining table, that looks out onto the garden, it’s currently raining, the sound is gorgeous, apparently it’s Summer, but it feels like a lovely autumn afternoon.. It’s nice and calm in here, my brother and his girlfriend are sleeping, my sister is at work and my Mum and Step Dad are chilling in their motor home..

I’ve got a real nice track playing on my UE Boom, it’s called ‘Summer Taste’

I woke up to my alarm around 07:30am today and I did the usual, brush my teeth, cleanse my face with rose water and moisturise with olive oil, I drank some lemon water and practiced 20 minutes of Yoga.

I headed out into the garden and the rain, to teach an online facebook meditation session, you can watch it back here..

I suppose, the reason I decided to blog this blog that i’m making, is because, I realise so many people in life are suffering, whether that be suffering from an illness, a breakup, financial hardship or stress, most of us have suffered something. But, what I have learned in my life recently, is that, if you go out of your comfort zone, pain is inevitable, however, suffering is a choice.. so just because you go through a breakup, like I did this year, it doesn’t mean you have to suffer. Pain is physical, we feel it, but suffering is in our mind, our perception, how we view things. What i’ve also learned, is that, it is extremely important to grieve, rather than suppress, so this is not about positive thinking “there’s plenty more fish in the sea”, this is about, dealing with our pain head on, this isn’t time to go fishing..

After my realisation of understanding peoples sufferings back in 2017, I quit my London management role and I set up on my own a Meditation class, to help relieve peoples stresses and to teach what i’ve learned, in the hope that it would help.

What I figured in my own life, is that, i’d tried the “retail therapy”, alcohol, smoking weed, relationships with men (and women actually), coffee, holidays, a management job that takes over your life, the gym, being a Vegan, being a Vegetarian, going clubbing etc etc but nothing, none of the above has been sustainable, none of it lasts. The one thing, that I tried 4 years ago and still to this day practice, is meditation…

I tell you why, and that’s because you don’t have to go to it, like you have to go shopping, or go clubbing, or go on holiday. Meditation happens, right here, right now, wherever in the world you are.

Our theme with this weeks Meditation classes is; “The Universe has your back” which is a great book written by Gabby Bernstein. I refer to the universe as a force greater than me, if you do not believe there is a greater force than you, then please make the sun shine and the rain stop 🙂

In Yoga & Meditation I speak about the chakras in the body. A chakra is an energy point, literally translates as wheel, it’s been said that there are 114 chakras in the body, however 7 major chakras situated from the bottom of your spine, up to the top of your head;

Muladhara (Root)

Svadhishthana (Sacral)

Manipura (Solar plexus)

Anahata (Heart)

Vishuddha (Throat)

Ajna (Third Eye) &

Sahasrara (Crown)

As our theme this week is about ‘the universe has your back’, I decided we would work with the Sahasrara chakra. Some say the Sahasrara chakra is the ‘Gateway to God’, for me, God is another word for universe or that force greater than me…so when I say ‘the universe has your back’ this is trusting in that universal energy/ God.

In meditation, many people, myself included, use crystals to interact with their chakras and to help with the healing process/clearing blockages in your chakras. This week we have been using Amethyst, which has actually been my favourite crystal since I was a little girl. Here is a piece of my Amethyst one of my lovely clients captured at class on Monday….

People meditate for different reasons, some meditate to relieve stress, some meditate for religious reasons and some meditate for ‘spiritual’ reasons if you like. I teach meditation to help people relieve stress, but what they gain is so much more beyond this.

If you too would like to further your meditation practice, totally free, you can watch daily facebook live guided meditation videos on my facebook page.

If you live in Welwyn Garden City or surrounding areas and would like to join us at group meditation classes, you can email me on louise@stresslessandrelax.com to book on.

I hope you have found this blog useful,

Love Louise

Founder & Director

How do I find balance?

We may hear or read a lot about people ‘finding balance’- work- life balance and so on, but how do we find balance? What does it mean to have balance?

Back in 2014 when I was 23, I was working in London, just down from the Gherkin and I was managing a multi million pound office building and a team of 4. I felt so proud and also starstruck at this time in my life, but I still had some issues… The accounts woman, for starters.. There’s always someone poking their nose in, pressing your buttons and boy did she rub me up the wrong way. After a 50 minute train commute and a 30 minute walk back, I finally reached home, which was in Ware, Hertfordshire, where I was living with my childhood sweetheart and his brother, i’d cook us all dinner, unscrew a bottle of wine, slob on the sofa and glug it back. I had nothing else to do, nowhere to be and to be honest, no energy to do anything else. So back then, that was my way of finding a work life balance!

What makes you tick?

That year my boyfriend and me flew to Thailand to visit my boyfriends Dad & step Mum. We were sat one evening on the island of Phi Phi, I was drinking a pina colada ..

..and my boyfriends Dad asked me “what makes you tick?” I felt this surge of embarrassment rise through me and flush into my cheeks, as I didn’t even know what he meant. I rustled up a response of; painting my nails and going shopping. It was although for the first time in my life, I consciously asked myself, ”what do you like doing?” and I didn’t even know! It has been the centre of my contemplation for years now, realising that balance is something more than alcohol, shopping or sex.. It’s something intangible. It’s a feeling and it doesn’t require something external to obtain.

I’d always been a very fiery, determined, ambitious workaholic. I constantly strived for more money, I liked to be the leader and to be in control of my life. 1 thing that always failed me, was my patience, the lack of it, my short temper and my anger.

Totally out of balance…….

Fast forward to 2015 now… My boyfriend and me broke up and I ran away to Australia. I met this polish guy, who was so full of wisdom, he was so interesting to listen to. I learned so much from him, I was besotted with him– totally out of balance… We were travelling on the road, in our Mitsubishi Pajero, just the 2 of us and I would constantly bring up this conversation of the 2 of us, why didn’t he call me his girlfriend? He used to say to me, “Louise you have me in this moment, why is this not enough? We drove together, cooked and ate together, we explored the West Coast of Australia together, we took photos together, we slept in the same bed, so why did I feel that what we had in that moment wasn’t enough? .. Because I was too focused on the future, but isn’t that near to insanity, because what I wanted was in front of me and I was too hooked on a time that didn’t even exist.

Early into my Yoga journey, I knew the benefits of practicing Yoga and so, I thought that I was just trying to find a place of ridding me of the anger, or the short temper that didn’t serve me.

Then one day I heard some very profound words spoken by Sadhguru. He said something along the lines of; ”you cannot have the highs, without the lows, if you let yourself get too high, you can also let yourself get too low, you cannot have the sun, without the rain” I must admit, I was taken back when I first heard these words, because i’ve always been a very enthusiastic, upbeat, bubbly person, the light and soul of a party. I used to get so excited about Christmas, even at 23 setting up our Christmas tree. If I had a holiday planned, i’d be packing weeks in advance, going out on shopping trips to colour co-ordinate my outfits, i’d check out the weather and all sorts, i’d totally run away with the future.

So being balanced is exactly what it says on the tin, just like a pair of weighing scales, neither too up nor too down, just equally balanced. In order to live continuously in a balanced state, you must take the sun with the storm, you cannot have high without low, but the key is to not run away with the high, because it can also lead us to go down with the low.

I gave a guided meditation this morning which you can watch here to talk about balance. To be balanced you need nothing, it is a feeling, and you gain balance with all that is within you, everything you need, is within you, you need nothing.

In mindfulness meditation, we reconnect to the here and now, so when we find ourselves unbalanced- focusing on the past or future, bringing our awareness to the here and now allows us to calm all that is getting distressed in the mind and body.

I hope you find this helpful 🙂

Love

Louise x

Founder & Director

Are you feeling overwhelmed from an intense week? Or maybe you feel like everyday is a struggle….

I don’t know about anyone else, but i’ve had such an intense week this week, that’s the clearest way to put it..

I’ve felt feelings of manipulation, i’ve felt feelings of overwhelm, i’ve felt pressured, emotional, confused, but of course too there have been feelings of joy and gratitude.

Digital detox

On the Friday evening of July 26th, I switched off my work iPhone and my personal Nokia and put them away for the weekend. When I was in a relationship with my boyfriend, I spent near to every weekend with him and his daughter, but since my boyfriend and I split in April of this year, I am not part of a friendship group, I don’t have close friends, so I have no reason to have them on.

I found that when I kept my phones on over the weekend, i’d have lots of negative self talk, because no-one was contacting me, i’d feel lonely, forgotten about. So i’m removing that ability for that to happen, it allows me to totally live in the moment, go with the flow and do what I feel to do in the moment and most important focus on me!

When I got to my work iPhone on Monday morning, I had a text from Barclays to say I was overdrawn.. *eye roll emoji* sums up how I was feeling..

This was the start to my feeling of overwhelm, as i’ve been tackling my biggest financial hardship for the past 3 years. If I give it too much attention, I can feel like i’m never going to get out of minus, I can feel like i’m never going to move out of my Mum & Step Dad’s house, then it’ll make me feel like I’ll have no freedom as i’m constantly having to live within other peoples boundaries & rules as such..

That’s how anxiety looks. We fret over things which haven’t even happened yet. It’s insanity really, but it’s real.

How can I stop feeling anxious? Suffering with anxiety?

What helps me when I see, hear, or feel something which makes me feel anxious, I acknowledge it, and I question it, so what I ask myself in that moment, is despite the fact i’m in my overdraft, has anything in my life changed? No. I’m still alive, still breathing, I have food in my belly, clothes on my back, so is there actually something endangering my life? No. Then i’m almost always able to put it to the side and focus on the moment of now. The same applies if you are fretting about something in your past or your future. You can use this same technique.

Make friends with change. Change is inevitable.

This week i’ve had to accept some changes and i’ve had to make some changes. Making decisions can be a really hard thing to do, because you make a decision based on that very moment, and as we know, from moment to moment, our feelings can change. Sometimes we feel liberated other times we feel we’ve made a mistake. Either way, upon reflection, you always learn. You either learn how to do something or how to not do something. You learn what’s important to you and whats not important to you.

Not always Happy Friday…

Friday 14th September 2018 I went and took part in one of the most interrogating, overwhelming, upsetting, soul destroying interviews of my life, when I found myself in an interview room at Hatfield Police Station speaking in defence of my rape case…

The next 7 months felt like a whirlwind, like I was that bit of tumbleweed spinning around at 100mph inside a tornado…

Fast forward to April when my boyfriend and I split, naturally i’ve been in reflection, but also a deep inward self discovery, I went on a 5 day noble silence Buddhist retreat in England, I went on a 4 day Yoga retreat in France and i’ve just started a journey with Reiki therapy.

I am not a Christian, but I remember one time at church I heard these words; “sometimes a wound has cut so deep, it requires specialist attention” I realised alone, I couldn’t heal myself, I needed specialist attention. I saw the below words;

This is where i’m at, i’ve been sticking my hands inside pulling out the root causes of my pain and i’m now having therapy to make peace with them. I am fully trusting in my journey and that everything is happening in my life as it should.

I am so grateful for second chances, thank you <3

I wish you love and light, health & healing, thank you for reading,

Love Louise x

Founder

Stress Less Relax To The Max Ltd

Do you hate waiting?

What is it about waiting that we hate?

Feeling like we could be doing something else..

Feeling like it’s wasted time..

Not knowing what to do with ourself as we wait…

People being late, not respecting our time….

Worry of being late to an appointment….

I mean, there are so many reasons as to why I hate waiting. I’m currently waiting right now, i’m due to collect my partners daughter from her house and I haven’t heard from said daughters Mum. It’s frustrating because I could have continued to read my book I put down, as I knew I needed to get ready, or I could be outside already, in the nature, getting on with our explorations, putting these binoculars to use!

I sit there obsessively checking my phone every 1 or 2 minutes to see if i’ve had a reply. I even think to text my partner and ask what should I do…

Then as I became consciously aware of what I was doing, I took a step back and realised, I have the whole day off, no-where to be, just collecting the little lady and off we go, when we do.

Realistically, there is no issue that i’m not there at 10 like I said I would be, it gives me the quivers because I hate not sticking to a plan lol, but what can I do? I haven’t heard back from my text of last night or of this morning, so I can only continue to wait, inside, in the warm, in the comfort of my own home, and put myself to use and publish my thoughts, as someone else may be able to resonate with me, and maybe this may help them too..

Mindfulness is a beautiful tool to learn, because you’re able to notice your actions, so if they’re actions that are not serving you well, i.e. pissing you off, then you can do something to change feeling pissed off, because I don’t know about you, but I don’t enjoy feeling pissed off lol..

If you’re not really sure what mindfulness is, or how to practice it, I do daily mindfulness meditation tutorial videos on my facebook page, for anyone to watch, totally free, you can watch them Monday-Friday, live at 7AM (UK time), or you can play them back, as many times as you wish, just click right here;

Love Louise x